Babbal Singh was sitting in a station smoking, when a woman came in, and sitting beside him, remarked: "Sir, if you were a gentleman, you would not smoke here!"

"Mum," said the Babbal, "if ye were a lady ye'd sit farther away."

Pretty soon the woman burst out again:

"If you were my husband, I'd given you poison!"

"WELL, MUM," returned Singh, as he puffed away at his pipe, "IF YOU WERE MY WIFE, I'D TAKE IT."